BULLIES

Bullies. They come in many shapes and sizes – some are big, some are small, some are really round and some are razor thin. But the top of the bullies’ hierarchy, the crème de la crème is that one who concealed the bully streaks well. He is the last person who you would suspect as the Bully – but the technique he adopts is true blue gangster-ism. He preys on those who he believed to be vulnerable, gullible and would stay quiet rather than cry for help. He has a niche of picking the right victims.

Some of us may have “him” in our offices. The nice guy armed maybe with many years of experience and walked his way up the corporate ladder – maybe holds a managerial position. He does small talk, seemed “genuinely concerned” about the welfare of others, appears to be sensitive to the needs of others. Some may be fooled to think that he is the champion for low paying workers. So be warned. The only agenda he has on his mind is his own. The only interest that he would like to hold is his own.

It is difficult to catch these Bullies red-handed– unless you are armed with a secretly concealed tape recorder or a camcorder all the time. He is very sleek in his actions, very cautious in the emails that he writes – making it difficult for the victims to report him. He makes sure that he has a clean record. He is an opportunist – he would go on his hunt when you are at your most vulnerable.

In the course of my career, I have met and worked with this type of professional bully. If I were to do a simple study, I would be able to show that the degree of office bully-ism is correlated to the number of years one has been in the organisation. And I have carried out some experiments on how to deal with these bullies.

It is a universal fact that a bully is basically someone who is actually afraid. He is afraid of many people – those who can stand up to him and those who are bigger than him – either in terms of physical size or the size of the pay check. Another way of putting it would be….He IS afraid, very afraid of his boss, the boss of his boss and the boss of his bosses’ boss. To them, he is the yes-man, all-can-do-man, the man who carries other people’s balls and a very willing party to kiss any bosses’ arse! *pardon my language*

There is proper recourse for victims of these bullies. You can stand up to them and refused to be victimised. You have a choice. I have met many people who constantly complained about being bullied in the office and what irks me most is that they constantly tell me that they have no choice. There is no such thing as “no choice”. You are the one who created a no choice situation so don’t complain.

I am sure if anyone who is pushed to the corner will find ways and means to retaliate. There are many ways to handle these unruly bullies. But leaving your job should be the last, the ultimate alternative. I have seen many talented, hardworking people who just leave quietly after being bullied. It is a decision that they make so I respect their decisions. It is a loss for any organisation.

I’ve always believe that every worker has his/her rights to be heard. Victims of office bullying must voiced out their concerns to someone of higher authority. Don’t give up too easily. The victims should not be the one who leave. It is the culprit who should. It is he who is negating the productivity level of the rest, creating a loss for the organisation. The tables should be turned, the victims MUST be cohesive and oust the bully. It is always the number game – Majority wins.

PS: Please don’t ask what triggered this. 8)